22:30 Posted in Americano , The Bitch , The HomoSEXual | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
"In Massachusetts, there has been a real shift in public opinion towards gay marriage. Once (straight) people realized that it doesn't affect their own marriages, a constitutional amendment against it became an issue of taking happiness away from their gay neighbors, their gay friends and their gay family members."
"My cousin is a horse masseur... Horsey people are weird."
"If it's a boy, it pees a line. If it's a girl, it pees a puddle." (dogs)
"Get your bike off the road. That's what the pavement is for!"
"Let me help you out of here. You won't survive these few blocks." (white people accidentally stepping into the ghetto)
"If you go to a black barbecue, there'll always be yellow cakes... Oh those are just cupcakes, but they don't know how to name them except by the color."
"I did have a short but fairly established jungle fever."
"They are already not happy that a small Asian guy is assuming the role of authority." (students/teacher)
"Back in Palestine, they'd not be happy if I spoke with an American accent. I won't get killed, but..."
"These ghetto kids don't really know how to be human. Whatever that is most important to them, they'd think it's also most important to you."
"I went to high school in Oklahoma, and the A-list girls would play this "Hate Game". Basically, each time they'd choose a girl to pick on, everyone had to say something they hate about her. When that girl finally broke down, they'd say, "Oh we didn't really mean it".
21:25 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
"Take care of mum" (a son's response, when his gay dad came out after 20 years of marriage.)
"Blacks are becoming the superminority. Both Asian and hipanic Americans are marrying whites but the Blacks aren't..."
"I have two Master degrees." (chat up line, San Francisco)
"Do they play black music here?" (husband asked wife, at a contemporary dance performance, Kansas)
"I grew up in a farm and every morning all the farmers would go and get coffee together. If you don't drive there in a pick-up truck, then they'd think you're a sissy." (Kansas)
"Honey, what's that on the drive way?" (The wife accidentally knocked over a deer on the Highway and dragged it all the way home leaving a long trail of blood.)
"Don't you eat squirrels?" (my insane driving instructor, Kansas)
"You don't have a girlfriend or a wife? That's interesting!"
"Being unique or individualistic is not a virtue here." (Missouri)
"Am I going to die?" (after drinking from the tap in Kansas City, which has the purest of all American tap water)
"My name is Britney and I am a Republican" (a Kansas daddy made his 4 yo daughter say that... 20years later, she votes for Hilary)
"Your chance to play a dead body on CSI. Call now! (CBS, a TV channel)
19:10 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (3) | Email this
"You should go back to where your people are." (school teacher trying to solve America's problem; SF)
"I'm a vegetarian." (who eats burgers; SF)
"How do you spell 'friend'?" (SF)
"Do you want some?"
"Is this > or this < greater than?"
"If I'm stressed, I'd quit!" (SF)
"Poor New Orleans. They still don't have UPS!" (SF)
"When I saw the news about New Orleans, I thought, what about the dogs? There won't be anyone around to take care of them!" (SF)
03:50 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
15:10 Posted in Americano , The HomoSEXual | Permalink | Comments (9) | Email this
Sure .......... (no meaning)
Good .......... (no meaning)
Very good .......... (no meaning)
Excellent .......... (polite) Whatever
Awesome .......... (polite) Whatever
Cool .......... (polite) Whatever
How are you? .......... (no meaning) Real answers strongly discouraged
Have a good day! .......... (polite) Get off me; Next!
You're so cute .......... (no meaning)
You're so sexy .......... (no meaning)
You're so hot .......... (no meaning)
You're so sweet .......... (polite) You're not cute/sexy/hot/good looking/gorgeous. Emphasis on inner beauty.
I like you .......... (no meaning)
I love you .......... (no meaning)
We'd see each other again ....... (polite) Don't bother
We'd get together some time ....... (polite) Don't bother
Call me when you're in town ....... (polite) Don't bother
Dating .......... (taboo) a non-Californian form of low speed physical gratification; risks emotional attachment; generally frowned upon
Hang Out .......... A strictly non-committal, non-romantic, pre-DVD watching social interaction; (see below)
Wanna come over and watch DVD? .......... (sexual proposition)
03:10 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
"That's why fork & knife were invented!" (a Japanese-American just couldn't pick up her tofu with chopsticks)
"Californian assumes relationships to be superficial."
"San Francisco is not America!"
"Midwesterners have values." (meaning *unlike California*)
"People in LA pretend to be richer than they really are, whereas people in New York try to look LESS wealthy..."
"I'm soooo over religion... by the way, my astrologist said, that this week Capricorns are..."
02:35 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
"he was like, and I was like... and it was like, it was like..."
"like, he was like, he was like... like, he was like..."
"she was like, like, ... it was like... it was like..."
"I was like, I was like, like ... he was like..."
"like, she was like... like, like... like, like, it was like, like, like, it was like, like..."
(Once, I was soooo annoyed by this very loud girl on the muni train I actually counted the number of times she said the word "LIKE" in a minute === 15, that's 1 per 4 seconds! Wish I had the gut to tell her that.)
02:40 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (1) | Email this
"Yeah, she is a mouse trapped in a human body..." (overheard; in a San Francisco restaurant)
"When I saw his body, I got an erection. But when I looked at his face, I lost it." (gay boy)
"Do you fake that accent?" (a friend of a friend's friend)
"I'd only feel like a wholesome human being until I can grow things (vegetables)." (at a party, SF)
"Well there are 4 gaps on each hand, right? So I can pick up 8 chickens at once by their legs." (at a party, SF)
" I never eat anything but the (chicken) breast. What do you think about chicken legs? Don't you think they smell a bit funny... like chicken shit? May be because the legs are close to the ground..." (lunchtime when I'm eating a drum stick, SF)
14:10 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
"You are here to work, you don't need to think." (an ex-communist scientist stopped his lab assistant from learning more)
"Are you from North Korea? I'm very patriotic. If I met you in the battlefield, I'd kill you." (a girl in a bar)
"Kylie is not that popular in here (in America)." "Who cares about America." "Everybody!"
"Stop saying "queue". Americans don't know the word "queue". Say "line"."
"America has the most powerful army in the world. American tanks can easily crush your Chinese tanks." (on my first day in SF)
"There is no media freedom in America." (personal communication, the editor of a major American scientific journal, at a conference)
"I'm sorry for Kerry." "Fuck Kerry, I'm sorry for the world!" (SF was dead on the day Bush got "re-elected")
23:00 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (0) | Email this
"I live in a very big house." "How big?" (overheard someone on a date in an exclusive restaurant)
"My pants cost 85 dollars, my trousers... Where do you get your clothes from? These are from H&M right? Very cheap." (a 21yo gay boy)
"I was in New York earlier this year, on the anniversary of 9/11. We sat on ground zero (site of the World Trade Center) that night, for a couple of hours actually, thinking that there might be firework or something." (a 23yo accountant)
"I just want you to know that you're working with intelligent people here." (in the lab; meaning himself)
"We can go out for 3 years." (on my first date)
"Look at his jeans, we should get jeans like that!" (a gay 30 something)
00:25 Posted in Americano | Permalink | Comments (1) | Email this